It is never too late to have an identity crisis.

And yes, maybe you *have* outgrown your husband.

What I can say is that (1) these conversations needs to be had with your husband (re how you feel about children, dissatisfaction, even depression) not with that other guy

& more importantly (2) you need to be careful how to proceed. If you keep seeing this guy because it feels good, you know very well that you could slip. Imagine THEN the fallout regarding your marriage (how you would feel if you did the ''unthinkable'' and the impact on your husband and your future together). Is momentary gratification justification enough to risk losing your marriage? Is a guy who is already married and keeping you a secret from his wife, someone you want to risk losing what you have?

Discuss with your husband, work on it *together*, work on finding who you are together... and yes, maybe it means splitting up but at least it is done in a transparent way, not a deceitful manner.