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Rose76
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Location: USA
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Default Feb 23, 2024 at 01:49 AM
 
I'm sorry, Will, that you feel so troubled, but I sure can identify with some of your big concerns. I'm a retired senior, and I'm pretty isolated. My income is much less now, but I have what I need in material things. I feel glad to have my apartment and my car and my pretty good health. But good health doesn't last forever. Lately, I worry what would happen if I had a stroke. What if I became mobility impaired? Even worse - what if I developed a real cognitive deficit? Both of those things happened to my boyfriend. I took complete care of him and made sure his every need was met. He is gone almost 4 years now. There is no one to do that for me. I have no children. My sisters are far, far away. They're nice enough, but time and distance has drastically changed my relationship with them. I don't hardly even know my nieces and nephews anymore. Friends I made along the way have scattered.

I'm even afraid to get a dog because I worry what would happen to a pet, if something happened to me. I'd be afraid to adopt an animal that might outlive me. A dog can live 15 years. There's no guarantee I'll last that long. So I go to the animal shelter website and look at photos of older dogs. But I'd have no backup, if I got sick and needed to be hospitalized.

My neighbor and I were friends. She passed away suddenly just before Christmas with no forewarning. Her apartment is still vacant. It saddens me to not hear her through the wall, as I used to.

Pains and aches are a nuisance. It's just harder to get things done. I used to be able to pick up a 40 pound bag of bird seed at the store. Now I have to ask for a stock boy to get it and then ask for another one to lift it into my car. Cold weather bothers me like it never did before. Last night I was driving and got lost in my own town, which made made me feel like I was losing my marbles. That happened twice in the past week. I don't see as well after dark.

We have multi-generational centers in my city with activities for all ages. I've checked two of them out, and they seem way better than the old-fashioned senior centers. So I want to sign up for some activities, but I keep putting off doing that. I used to have more confidence. Now I feel like I'm in some kind of general decline. Social phobia that I fought all my life has come back and seems out of control.

Of course five or ten years from now, we'll look back and wish we were the age we are now.
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