Hi again That's hard about his T. I hope that will get straightened out soon. I definitely agree about you not being a T but a partner. I imagine it is so hard. My son struggles with some issues (not a dissociative disorder) and it was hard to see him in so much pain and not be able to do anything. But I did learn that while I wasn't able to do much, he still felt my support and was able to lean on it when needed. I think that's what our role can be, even when we aren't knowledged enough to help in other ways. I used to tell my T that I would have to quit so son could go to her because she was such a good T and I wanted son to have her. She said that was a nice thought, but it doesn't really work that way lol. So, stick with your T. Your T might also be able to give you some support and direction in supporting your boyfriend too.

I struggle with knowing. My T does not tell me things that other parts discuss with her, but quite honestly, I don't want to know. It's probably a form of denial, but that denial is what got me this disorder in the first place I guess.

I think one problem I have with people telling me what I missed, if they know I missed, is because it's too scary. What if they tell me something that my part of the brain wasn't ready to handle. Just be careful disclosing.

I know there is a running tape in my head calling me all sorts of names so I know it must be hard to hear negative things said about him. I don't have any advice there either other than to negate the negative with some positive stuff.

Just remember, it's all the same guy overall, but I do understand your feelings and Jon's feelings on that. I would say don't worry about integration at this time, until he can get to a T. If his brain is ready for that step, I think it will do it though.

Not sure this was much help, but I wanted you to know I care and am glad you're here and posting.