Dear T,

A couple things: I felt very validated today, regarding the H yelling stuff. So thank you for that. And not putting it on me as overreacting, as it felt ex-MC tended to do.

Also, I keep thinking of how you said you held that one male teen client's hand all session when his parent had passed away. I had wanted to ask you about a brief handshake in the middle (instead of just at the end) of the session two Sundays ago where I was having a panic attack. It would have been an obvious opening today, when you mentioned that, to ask if you might have done that with me. Like 30 seconds, not the whole session. But it might have been especially painful if you'd said no.

I suppose I could ask if you'd ever be willing to do a pre-session (if I'm feeling really anxious/we'd had a conflict--I've wondered this before) or mid-session handshake, with the expectation that you'd say no. And thinking if you'd say "yes" or "maybe," that would be a positive? Though if it's a "no" (or "probably not"), maybe we could talk about other options for nonverbal grounding, connection, etc. Like what someone on Quora described with client and therapist each squeezing their own hands on their respective laps from across the room, with no actual touching. Or, I don't know, if you could hold some stone in your hand, then set it on the ottoman for me to pick up and hold. So it's like a connection, but no actual touch. I'll think about whether it's worth asking.

Love,
LT