Resided in China for 20 years, married a Chinese women some 10 years ago ,(wife is 35 and myself 77 now) returned to Australia 4 years ago and with child and wife, she is very unhappy, myself not perfect some lies were told in our marriage but I am to blame on all most everything, she suffers depression blame me for it, suggesting I should see a therapist instead of her .

Sone after our daughter was born the she become aggressive and insulting and swearing at me angry at not listening at her advice about company matters, on many occasions she wouldn’t t stop yelling and swearing had to send her home with my driver, trashed the apartment a few times and I let it go thinking it has something to do with post-natal depressions, suggest then she should see a doctor but in China this is a no-no.

Then and now, attempting to have some kind of conversation is futile, she constantly interrupts and get very angry. Just before she left our home, told me she was dating on line to find out if she is still desirable and find love , that was very hurtful. My daughter tells me , “mama wants you to die to find another man younger to look after her”.

Left home some 3 weeks ago and said she needs time to evaluate our relationship and she wants to come back in two months. For the las 4 year no sex and the level of personal insults toward child and me and swearing is staggering. She said sorry for being a monster but her excuse ‘I am angry’. Twice had to call the police got crazy and attempted to commit suicide and taken to hospital , she convinced the doctors nothing wrong with her, they let he go back home. Despite everything , still ,call me stupid, I have felling’s for the women just very worried to let her back home without her seeking mental help , I have a child and she doesn’t want mom to come back home. The child become withdrawn, lost appetite and stroppy now , she tells me mama hurts her and I am scared of her.
As an aside, my wife is a very intelligent lady, I employed her in China as my translators, and she had a BS in Exterior Commence, she told her self very fluent in English and turns that she was very efficient in to running my aerospace business, year later she become partner in to the business. My wife had an affinity to the western world and at my retiring we moved to Australia.

Once she become an Australian citizen she enrolls at the universities to study law , first year passing all examination with very high percentage and she got herself a part time job as a clerical in a local law firm. She has a golden heart and shares with the family. Don’t understand how is possible someone with depression act normal and for some reason becomes a monster. Some time in my mind I think, was I used to a ticked to the west..? Our age gap is huge, then again culturally Chinese women don’t mind age and looks as long the man looks after them. Can folks with depression mask the change of personality..? what can I do to help, let her go to find her own way or keep soldering on..?

Respectfully
King Momo