You can read through some of my stuff. I was overwhelmingly manipulated by my wife. It wasn't until after we'd separated for several months that I had our youngest at a counselling session.

The counselor brought me in and advised no-contact with her mom because of her mom's covert narcissism.

I'd never heard that term before.

I have some family who are psychologists... They live several hours from me. One is a law enforcement PTSD specialist, the other works in private practice. When they heard I was separated they both flagged the concerns they'd had about me for years. and things that they saw that gave them pause and concern.

It was a learning experience.

Looking back, I can see one simple way my wife manipulated me. It was by always negging her appearance. Yet, she is very, very physically attractive. I can see, looking back, that she dressed very well to display her figure, and always looked put-together when going out.

She often wore very sexy undergarments, and wore things that gave a little peek of those things, but still constantly berated her appearance.

It was manipulation. It was to attain constant fawning attention, desire, and reassurance at home.

She probably got approached, hit on and complimented by men in public regularly.

If your partner is truly a covert narcissist.... Truly.... Not just a pop-psych term you picked up, be aware.... They are empty inside. You can't fill them up. No matter what you do, how much you give, they are empty inside. They WILL use you up, drain your emotional resources, and move on.

RDMercer