Today My H and I went to see T. We had agreed on going to do some couples work about once a month and it's been two since he came with me. The last session was wonderful and H and I really connected. Tonight, I wanted to walk out after 10 minutes and leave them to their mano e mano talk.

GRRRRRR

T jumped on me to change the way I said things. He fawned over H. He was so freaking careful to make sure that H's position was heard. Nobody heard me. It was sooo difficult.

I hate him. (T not H)

Funny thing was, H doesn't want to go back either because he said it's obvious T and I have a relationship that he is not part of. But in way I feel like that's his easy out, you know?

I don't need this now. I have surgery on Friday (out patient female stuff).

And another thing (LOL) !! I have been feeling very distant from T anyway. I wonder if this all plays in together. My feelings of not being close to him, him validating H more than me. It was clear that he didn't want to hear me. He wanted so much to hear my H and validate him. I am so sad. The hard part here is I don't know how to bridge this. It's like, ****em I just want to drop out.