Thank you all for taking the time to not only read my rather long post here, but also taking the time to reply back, as well as the huggs from everyone else... Apologies, however, for it taking a bit of time to logging back in on this site. Been struggling a bit of late with good old depression (gotta love it - not).


Raspberrytorte, most of my family is like that, in fact. Sorry to hear that yours does the same. My uncle (before passing away), who has absolutely no patience whatsoever for mental diagnosis', went as far as to tell me (though this wasnt directed at me, but still) that he would load the gun and pull the trigger, if, someone wasnt able to get their crap together and just wants to remain depressed (wanting for it to all end). A week before 2017 Xmas, in fact, bcuz he got woke up by something i was doing in my apartment (as I rented from him), he met me out on the front porch Likewise, my family are real gems when it comes to these types of health issues (no patience or understanding whatsoever). Genuine sympathy (((huggs)))


JaneOnceMore,mentally speaking, this has to be (quite literally) one of the hardest things Ive had the horrible misfortune of experiencing, albeit doing, in my life to date. My hat is off to anyone who can navigate and traverse through these disability waters, bcuz lets face it, if my life depended on me doing this? Yaaaaa, lets just say my avoidant side of me would end up doing just that - avoiding this like the plague. Aside from all that, while I have done a lot of writing through the decades (only amateur/ novice attempts to be honest, I simply try and write whats on my mind or from the heart. Ive thought about sharing some of my work on this site (shared some of my photography at one time, yet have sense removed it. What can I say, im am my own worst critic. Nevertheless, thank you so much for the compliment.



In relation to what, both, Unaluna and Tart Cherry Jam are suggesting. I greatly appreciate the advice, however, I honestly don't know If this is something I'll be able to do at this time. Maybe when Im able to pull myself back up out of all the depths (/hangs head low - why does this have to be so difficult)?...


Tart Cherry Jam, you are more than welcome to share the information (about the lawyers) if you like though. I just don't know when, if at all, I'll be able to venture down that road. Might just end up closing the case altogether, as i find it far too crippling and defeating anytime the topic even so much as gets brought up. Been even considering as i simply do not fit in anywhere in this world. And to be 1000% honest, being surrounded by others (mainly family) who remind you of your faults and weaknesses - well, just wish I was never born is all. Apologies if this is a tough read, however, and if its triggered anyone reading it. This is why I do my best to stay so isolated and alone anymore. No one wants to hear or deal with any of this

Thank you all again though. Having anyone read of reply back to anything Ive posted means more to me than you know. As I always refer to myself as anymore, I am the ghost which languidly drifts through a crowded room, unseen and unwanted.