So this is what happened...my shrink yelled at me and said "I'm the therapist YOUR the client" and treated me like poo in general one session, which she never does. WE always talk like friends but all of the sudden she pulled this whole power thing on me and made me feel bad.

So I have all kinds of PTSD and I'm a little borderline and have some flashbacks but Im pretty functional. Anyway, a lot of the stuff I have PTSD from would happen at night in my bed as you mayi magine and so I have a hard time falling asleep sometimes.

I'm sorry- I'm trying to be brief. Anyway. I woke up the next day and there was sort of a voice in my head. It wasnt an auditory hallucination, It was like a guy in my head who was talking to me. He introduced himself, told me his name and said that he would be taking care of me now and to ditch the shrink, that the shrink could not be trusted.

And I went back to sleep and it was like someone else was there to watch over me but it WAS me, kind of. It wasnt really an issue for the rest of the day but then when I tried to go back to sleep that night, ususally I think about my shrink and it helps me sleep.. Just like she's sitting at the foot of my bed reading a book or something.

Well, the guy in my head came back and he was mad and he said to stay away from her and I was afraid of him and I tried to email my shrink to tell her but then the guy got mad and scary and I didnt want to make it worse and then I felt like I wasnt sure who was typing, me or him and I felt like he could take over and I didnt tell my shrink bc I thought she would just think I was being dramatic and also I didnt want to %#@&#! off the guy in my head. This happened on and off for a few days.

Then I had this really big panic attack the next day and I called my shrink and she stayed on the phone with me for like a half hour and was really nice and there wasnt a guy in my head anymore with a name and a personality, but just a guy voice, then a few days lately it was just a thought and now it hasnt been happening anymore.

But things arent the same anymore. I used to tell her everything and now I dont feel the same.. I dont trust her like I used to. I want to. But I feel like I should stop acting crazy and not tell her any of this and just try to be good. Ithink she likes me so much better when Im normal and not crazy. I think I make her tired. I was going to off myself once and she asked me not to, for her and I do all these thing "for her" becasue I dont have anyone else and I was really attached to her, but I've been stupid. It's all bs. She's my shrink. It's not real. It's her job. I think she'll say anything to keep me functioning and like she said, I'm just a client. Really, I have no one that I don't have to pay.

Anyway. Similar experience, anyone?

Anyway. It came, it went, what was it. Was I just being extremely borderline and a big identity thing? Was it more Borderline or more DID? Was it either? Am I just being dramatic? Any thoughts?

Many many thanks.