Sometimes I overlook the obvious. I was wondering how @Nammu figured out that you two got together very young. Then I did the math. Yes, you were ages 18 and 17. Perhaps neither of you has even had any other close relationship. So there's a lack of experience at play here.

I'm not opposed to anyone marrying their high school sweetheart. I don't believe you need to go through multiple relationships to understand what building a strong bond is about. But a commitment made very early in life can backfire. It may be that fear of being alone made you cling to each other for security, before you two really knew what you were looking for in a relationship. It does sound like you each have a significant psychological problem. You have identified yours and have sought help for it. He sounds to me like he has a serious maturity deficit. I'll bet your controlling tendency is, to some extent, an attempt to offset his immaturity.