I agree. There's validating what you are feeling while discussing or processing the event and helping one see the event through different lenses. Because the feelings are real and not everything really happened (a quote from Dr. S). Being able to discuss/process an event without invalidating or taking over the feelings is a skill that most people do not have.

I paid someone to get to know me in such a way that they could do that the majority of the time. She was not perfect, we had missteps, she would at times say something that fell flat. And since a large majority of my issues are with interpersonal relationships - the relationship built with her allowed me a place to experience those missteps and process them with someone that would stay neutral with me while processing the event. She would try and mostly succeed in keeping her stuff out of the room. I don't know too many people that are skilled at doing that and in reality a friendship isn't like that. I needed the experience of successfully navigating ruptures so that I could learn how to navigate them with other people in my life. Which means, sometimes idle chit chat was needed to have the relationship feel like a relationship.

And paying someone for support -- being a blank canvass as you verbally and emotionally process the events of your life is not a waste of time or money. Sure on any one of these types of sessions, a friend could have been equivalent. Friends have their own stuff and most can get tired when you tell the story for the 5th time forget it if you are still holding on to something after the 10th time or 2 yrs later. So even if you are using them only as a place to vent out frustrations about something in your live that you are powerless to change; they are providing a frame/space for you to say what you have to say or sit with yourself while you feel whatever you are feeling; without the expectations that are found in friendships.