((((hugs)))) to both of you. It sounds like a potentially positive development. At least you now know what you can't, and shouldn't, tolerate.
Hopes and prayers that you can find a smooth ride through menopause. I was grateful to have found my solution. Prior to taking vitex, I'd sleep with a pile of clean towels and t-shirts next to the bed- waking up in the middle of the night having sweated enough that it felt like I'd just gotten out of a swimming pool. And the hot flashes were awful- they would often come in rapid succession and my head would feel so hot and tight, like it might pop. After vitex, it felt like I went back to being an eleven year old kid with very few hormonal issues.
Sending positive vibes to you.