So sorry you are so unhappy and frustrated with your job . You're ready for a change.

What are the core-limiting beliefs about yourself, about others, about life that are contributing to your reality? What is blocking you?

There's a book called Born to Win which might be helpful.

You can check out your library, or if you want an inexpensive secondhand version, check out AbeBooks | Shop for Books, Art & Collectibles

You are by no means a failure, you just need clarity so you can grow and change your circumstances.

Hang in there. You can do this!

Wishing you better days ahead!!