My Support Forums - View Single Post - Update - Moving On. New Phone Number. New Life (PIcs Inside)

LadyShadow · Apr 13, 2024 at 07:28 PM

Hey there @unaluna ! I am so glad you found the book! I have been looking at it a while now, taking little bits and pieces each day.

I am backtracking today, I was listening to "Green Eyes" by Coldplay - it was a song my husband used to sing to me, and I started bawling. Now that he is gone, I am missing him so much, and I just think of myself as such as masochist, beating myself with the stick and causing self-inflicting wounds. What is my obsession? Do I need his love that badly?

Then I read today's lesson from the Language of Letting Go and it all makes sense. Why don't I let myself feel enjoyment?

Excerpt from “The Language of Letting Go” (April 13 - Enjoyment):

One of the prohibitions many of us learned in childhood is the unspoken rule: don’t have fun and enjoy life. This rule creates martyrs - people who will not let themselves embrace the pleasures of day-to-day living. Many of us associated suffering with some sort of sainthood. Now, we associate it with codependency. We can go through the day making ourselves feel anxious, guilty, miserable, and deprived. Or we can allow ourselves to go through that same day feeling good. In recovery, we eventually learn the choice is ours. There is much to be enjoyed each day, and it is okay to feel good. We can let ourselves enjoy our tasks. We can learn to relax without guilt. We can even learn to have fun. Work at learning to have fun. Apply yourself with dedication to learning enjoyment. Work as hard at learning to have fun as you did at feeling miserable. Our work will pay off. Fun will become fun. Life will become worth living. And each day, we’ll find many pleasures to be enjoyed.