I don’t remember how to do “trigger WARNINGS.’
++++++++++TRIGGER WARNING +++++++==
TRIGGER WARNING !+++++++++.
This is in regard to exploitation by a psychiatrist that occurred many years ago.
PrevT told me,
“He (AbusivePDoc) forced you to do something sexual...legally/technically not “rape”...but in all ways despicable and abusive like rape.”
——
1) WHY WASN’T IT R*PE? WHY?
2) Even if PrevT wasn’t calling it r*pe, she says it was still as despicable and abusive as r*pe.
I don’t understand why she didn’t talk to me more about it when I was in treatment with her?
It’s obvious to me now I was still confused by it because it wasn’t until years later when I started seeing CurrentT that it occurred to me that I still didn’t know what to call it. I was asking, “Wait, what happened to me??” Because I said, ‘no.’
I told PrevT (and the police and the medical licensing board and my civil lawyer and the sexual abuse advocate) exactly what happened,
I told PrevT that afterwards I felt ‘happy I could do that for him,’ after all. Like, I wasn’t hurt..or mad..or distressed that he had forced me to do something I didn’t want to do. How screwed up was I!?
And she never challenged me on it, that I can remember. She never challenged me with, ‘Pre, you said you couldn’t breathe....you weren’t scared?...you were *happy* about that?’
And, no, I wasn’t! I think I must have been in shock and disbelief! She didn’t make me think about it. Why didn’t she challenge me about it? Maybe there was a reason she didn’t? I don’t know.
Why?
And why wasn’t it technically or legally r*pe? ?