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cool09
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Member Since Feb 2012
Location: Eastern MD
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Default Apr 16, 2024 at 03:27 PM
 
Quote:
What you haven't mentioned is ever having a therapist who specializes in dissociative disorders.
I've seen tons of therapists since 1992 and they were all completely incompetent! None of them spoke to me! I've brought my dissociation up with lots of psychiatrists (in and out of the hospital) and therapists over the last 10 years and none of them will discuss it! I only figured out that I dissociated maybe 10 years ago after doing some research on the internet. What I had was Derealization and Depersonalization. When I was in my teens I felt unreal and everything around me seemed unreal. It is extremely hard to describe but when I looked in the mirror I felt very unreal (if you can understand that). I did have a therapist a couple years ago who I saw for 2.5 years and she was easy to talk to but she didn't talk about dissociation or Asberger's one bit. All she did was give out general information about anxiety which didn't help me at all! Deep breathing didn't work and she told me "You have to manage it!" and I had no clue what she was talking about! She had me walking, riding a bike and swimming and I couldn't stand any of it! None of it helped my mood or energy so I quit therapy! And she was the best therapist I've ever seen!

I saw one of the top Psychiatrists at Johns Hopkins a few years ago and I told him that dissociation and a severe mood disorder in my teens damaged my personality. I told him it took away every quality I had before age 13. He was completely dumbfounded and didn't understand! My experience is that the mental health system doesn't work at all! I haven't gotten anywhere with any professional the last 35 years! All they want to do is experiment with me and give me more ECT which doesn't do a thing!
My present Dr. (who is pretty bright but very young and has shown some interest in me) gave me some therapy months ago and I told him I've been trying to relearn how to relate and connect with people the last 45 years and he raised his voice at me and said I have a "loop" in my head and that I have to stop! And he told me that I'm trying too hard and he doesn't want me to do anything.

I don't live near Philly. I live in a rural area in northern MD and I've seen every psychiatrist in this area and they are all horrible! And I've traveled to Philly and Baltimore to see psychiatrists and they were all lousy! The last 2 therapists I've seen didn't say a thing to me! And another therapist wouldn't let me talk so I stopped going to see her! And another crazy therapist wanted to send me to New Orleans to a hospital for 30 days for some reason!
I told a young therapist at Sheppard Pratt Hospital that I didn't want to do anything and she said "I can't help you". That was my problem that I needed help with! Then I told her I didn't want to live and she didn't say a thing so I never went back to her!

Quote:
VanGogh was miserable
Yeah, unfortunately lots of very talented musicians, artists and scientists have suffered greatly from mental illness.

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