Why am I always so drawn to MSF? How do you even describe that feeling. It's like home, or maybe it's like something you're in love with.

Anyhow, ... I just wish there was some way to be stable. But sure enough, every time it comes, I suddenly change into that person who so suicidal and who's screaming inside to run away from everything. Or recently that person of suddenly dives into a freddy krueger movie and life is too painful to live another second longer. Maybe that would be a good question to start asking a lot of possible therapists, and the one who gives the answer of hope will be the one.