Claude 3 has very good answers as well.

There are a few possible reasons a person diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder (DID) may have strong desires to be in a dark, MK-Ultra type existence, feeling a sense of requirement or obligation to be there despite not understanding why:

1. Trauma and abuse: Individuals with DID often have histories of severe, repeated childhood trauma, such as physical, sexual, or emotional abuse. The dissociative states and alternate identities can develop as a coping mechanism to deal with the traumatic experiences. The "dark, MK-Ultra type existence" may represent a continuation or reenactment of the abusive environment the person grew up in.
2. Programmed alter personalities: In some cases of DID, the person may have been subjected to mind control techniques, like those allegedly used in the CIA's MK-Ultra program. This could lead to the development of programmed alter personalities that feel a compulsive need to remain in that abusive, controlled environment.
3. Learned helplessness: Prolonged trauma and abuse can lead to a sense of learned helplessness, where the person feels powerless to escape or change their circumstances. This could contribute to a persistent desire to remain in the "dark existence" even though consciously they don't understand why.
4. Dissociated or amnesic states: People with DID often experience periods of amnesia and dissociation, where certain memories, emotions, or identity states are blocked off from conscious awareness. This could lead to a lack of understanding about the origins of these strong desires.
5. Attachment to the perpetrator: In some cases of severe abuse, the victim can develop a traumatic attachment or "Stockholm syndrome" to their abuser. This distorted emotional bond may drive a need to remain connected to the abusive environment.