View Single Post
jesyka
Poohbah
 
jesyka's Avatar
 
Member Since Jun 2020
Location: U.S
Posts: 1,316
4
272 hugs
given
Default May 03, 2024 at 11:08 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TryToBeBetter View Post
Hey Jesyka, it really can be tiring being worried about how the other person will react. I don't know you or him, but one thing about what you said you said to him is there is a difference between giving feedback and giving an instruction (which some people don't take well).

Its perfectly fine to say "that's a strong aftershave. Did you use a lot?" But telling him to use less is ordering him to do something. For me I am fine if someone asks me to do something ("could you use less?"), but as an adult it can be demeaning to be told what to do ("please use less next time"). He isn't a child even if you might think he acts like one sometimes.

I am not saying this to criticize you, I am just trying to explain why he might react as he did.
Hi, thanks for explaining things to me. Maybe I do need to rephrase everything in a nicer way probably. I didn’t think that I sounded harsh, but who knows?

I have noticed that he really doesn’t like to hear about anything that he considers to be less than positive though which isn’t healthy at all.

As I said, he will often dismiss me, shut me out or tell me to shut up, or yell at me when I even ask him if he paid the credit card bills yet, ugh.
jesyka is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
TryToBeBetter