Scarlet, I'm sorry for your situation! Being practical here - being somebody who had to leave an abusive situation - about her not finding out about where you're going: have you considered how and when you move at all on the day of? Consider splitting up cars, making it seem like it's one person going somewhere, coming back, another one leaving, and then go together when you know she's not looking or whatever? Of course I don't know your exact circumstances, but misleading people like that can make it harder. Also, if she knows where you usually go for some appointments (like weekly hairdresser or smth), try to change the schedule around. So she can't follow you to and from.