Maybe someone at Human Verification could direct you to low-cost online counselling.

You were a swinger (I myself dabbled...) so why not ask your wife for her consent for you get back into The Lifestyle? That way you won't be "cheating" on her.

Also be aware that there is such a thing as a high sex drive, but that is different from the constant need to self-soothe which sex can also be. Are there other things you could do to self-soothe that wouldn't be harmful to yourself or others?

Or other activities: Lifting weights / Bodybuilding perhaps? Swimming?