Had my appointment with my therapist this morning. The past couple of nights I've been sleeping from approximately 11pm to 5am, so that's good. I'm still horny as hell though, and I started spotting yesterday and still am today, so my therapist thinks my hormones may be all fukked up right now, causing the strange in-between period spotting and sauciness. She recommended I make an appointment to see my primary. She pretty much said I'm getting old so my hormones could be changing. Fukk I hate getting old. I DON'T want to get a mammogram. I DON'T want to be a little old lady. Fukk this sucks.

Physically I've been feeling much more energetic though. No more lethargy. I think it's because I started paying closer attention to what I'm eating. I started adding chia seeds to my oatmeal in the morning to get more protein and overall started making sure I'm getting more protein (not from meat or dairy. I've gone fully vegan again). I've been consuming between 1000 to 1400 calories per day. And taking walks. And exercising at home.

So far I haven't noticed any weight loss. If anything I just think I'm getting even FATTER, but that could be my imagination.

Our daughter is 5'5". She's about an inch taller than me, so I must be 5'4". That's a relief! I'm not QUITE as obese then.

I don't know. I'm just pissed about being 41. And I'll be turning 42 in August. FUKK. Great. I'll be even fukking older. I know everyone gets old... I'm just not ready for it!

But anyway, so my therapist doesn't think I'm hypo or anything, just fukked up hormonally. Don't know what can really be done about that anyway, but whatever I guess. I'm due for a pap anyway in August. I'll just see if my insurance will pay for me to get it sooner.

Overall I've just been really irritable, pissed, and horny.

Hopefully the past couple of nights of six hours of sleep weren't just flukes and I keep on sleeping from 11pm to 5am.