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Junerain said:
you wrote about wanting to kiss her and wanting to caress her- I can tell you are a sexual person!!

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hi, thanks for your reply.
Well maybe I'm weird but to me kisses are not sex related.. and I meant caress her but mostly in non sexual places.. I just like to stroker her hair and skin, it's all very romantic in my head.. and about foreplay.. well we do a lot of that but if I'm not "on" it's all very adorable and pleasant, but it's not.. uhm.. "useful".. it leads nowhere sexually, you know? What makes me worry is that I like the non sex stuff so much..
Maybe I just don't know what my body wants..
as for communication.. I haven't told her I don't feel anything yet, sex is new to our relationships we didn't get many opportunities for intimacy, just a couple. I just got nervous about my reaction to it right away and that's why I'm posting.. not that I think you guys are superheroes or my saviours, I just needed to talk.. listen.. I might sound childish but I just really want not to ruin anything cause I love her so much... thinking about "practicing" in bed makes me feel bad.. like everyone else can do it and I have to study and try and practice and bother her with this thing.. I don't know if I can't explain myself properly.. why can't I just experience what she is? As I said before, I feel very guilty for not being.. well.. "normal". As in.. carefree about sex, relaxed, physical, in the moment.. darn.
I feel like I failed an exam