Quote:
Originally Posted by CANDC
@Hanna2 welcome to MSF. I am sorry you feel a conflict going on with the therapist. That must have an impact on the benefit you get from therapy.
What I would be concerned about is your focus seems to have shifted from how can I get more out of therapy to how can I feed my romantic fantasies. To me this is not going to benefit you and may have a negative impact on your relationship with your partner and your therapist.
Have you considered that this also may be a sign of troubles in your relationship with your partner? Maybe that is something the therapist could help you with.
I see this happen a lot in therapy. They call it transference. Maybe your therapist knows how to handle this kind of thing professionally but that would take a willingness for you to not feed the fantasies.
CANDC
[If you want me to see your reply to this post please include @CANDC in your message - not in requoting my message]
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I think one reply frames what can be a natural relational development in therapy as something concerning and in need of conflict management.
Crushing on your therapist can be really fertile ground for exploring what is happening for you in relation to others, in your responses to attachment, what role imagination plays for you in life, all kinds of interesting and powerful considerations. I don't see it as a case of "feeding romantic fantasies" but more about exploring your love, passions, vitality - perfect endeavours for therapy.
If you trust her and she has practised good therapy with you up to this point, this could be the start of deepening your work even further. I would only proceed with caution if you have a sense that she's not competent or the therapy is unsafe in some other way.