Hmm. It came up because we were talking about dreams that were disturbing/distressing to me. I was telling her about others and then I admitted one was about her. I don't remember how she asked me for details. Probably just reassured me and reminded me that opening up about these things, "bringing light to them", makes them less powerful, have less of a hold on me. And I verbally told her. (Sometimes I tell her hard things in a letter for her to read in-person). She said it was beautiful, tender, and loving. She didn't see anything wrong with it except that it was distressing to me. The fantasy does pop into my head from time to time. It no longer bothers me like it used to. It comes and then goes.

My T is very open to these kinds of things. We're currently talking about bodies and why I think it's bad or inappropriate to imagine other's bodies. (I'm having issues imagining her breastfeeding). She is completely relaxed and accepting. She said it's normal and natural. I don't know if that's true... We're still in process.

Even if your T has issues of her own (i.e. is uncomfortable), the focus should be on you. Let her issues be her own for her to deal with in her own therapy. You focus on you. It's your space.

About being outside vs being in the room: maybe the change in boundaries triggered the change in feelings. Losser boundaries might allow for more feelings. Like you said about chitchatting. Maybe you're just more comfortable? Either way, you are not wrong for your feelings.