Don’t beat yourself up for what you didn’t know. Alcohol use only makes anxiety and depression worse. When a person experiences fear and insecurity they look to escape and this is when a person can begin to abuse alcohol and drugs.

I’ve met people in their 50’s that have addiction problems and their maturity is that of a teen or 20 year old. That is why their behavior patterns tend to be narcissistic. The person tends to just want to “party” and not be an adult. These individuals tend to live in denial and don’t want to admit they have a problem. They engage in gaslighting and manipulation and denial because they want to continue to engage in this “partying” lifestyle. YET, they slowly become addicted to where they need alcohol/drugs in their system to feel normal. This is when they get moody and begin to change often becoming more depressed and anxious. They often begin to put themselves in the victim role. Again very much within what is described as narcissistic behavior patterns. They don’t really grow but instead stay fixed and stuck and often fall behind. They look for codependents to give in and baby them and sooth their ego.

But THAT is not love. If you have a child it’s important you maintain your own sobriety and be there for your child. We do NOT get a redo when it comes to children and their development.