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Originally Posted by Ninetiesgrl13
We were never that sort of healthy couple. We thought we were for years but in hindsight I believe we were suffocating each other with love and codependency. We definitely have changed in the marriage. Right now I am trying to find peace and heal and decide on what I want to do with my life as an individual. I really hope that he does the same for himself. He’s always at home though, he’s just an introverted homebody of sorts. I can’t exactly force him to have individual pursuits.
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Sounds like you nailed the problem. Couples that share codependency usually have a shelf life because one or both get better and thus ends the dependency issues that brought them together. The marriage should never BE your identity. Hard to maintain that level of investment if its driven emotionally. Over time those feelings that you depend on to carry you through daily issues wane and lose their effectiveness and meaning. I wish you the very best in your quest for happiness.