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RDMercer
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Member Since May 2013
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Default Jun 20, 2024 at 08:54 AM
 
It’s going really, really well.

I’m happy most of the time. I’m really relaxed most of the time.

Work almost drove me insane until I changed my thinking.

These things are true: I have a good job with benefits and a good work/life balance, I’m respected by my peers and immediate management, but upper management screwed me over. Yup. That happens. There are bigger injustices in the world.

My dad drives me crazy with some stuff. Ok. I voiced it and I keep a boundary. I enjoy him as I can, and there is definitely good in him to enjoy.

My kids are awesome and happy and healthy. They love it at home. They have good relationships in their lives. They are making good choices and I enjoy them so much.

I’m teaching part time at a local community college and kicking butt at it. Apparently I’m extremely good at explaining, helping visualize problems, and I’ve been told “inspiring” to the students. Outside of the class I’ve also been hired to work one on one tutoring tradespeople in math, science, and document use.

DD and I went to visit my parents for the Father’s Day weekend. While away the oldest enjoyed the house with his friends and had the lawn mowed and the alternator changed on my car when we got back. He also bought his younger sibling a kayak so they could go fishing together

Money is tight but all the bills are paid. Some months we have a bit more some months we’re a bit short.

And a very attractive woman at the community college said yesterday “how about we take you to get that tattoo related to your wife lasered off. I’ll wear something sexy. We can post a bunch of before and after photos and selfies together on social media. I know your wife’s bestie. It will drive them crazy.”

It’s not in me to do that, but the offer was funny and flattering. I’ve not told anyone about it in real life

. Last week my wife blocked the mortgage renewal on the house and then withdrew almost $5000 that I’d paid down on our joint LOC. She’s trying to push my monthly payments through the roof

Brilliant plan on her part to do this a couple of months before we are in court again….

I was angry about that for two days, but then it’s like…. Ok….. This is going to blow up in her face. I just have to weather this for a couple of months.

I’m fairly confident things are crumbling for my wife. I’m not saying that maliciously. I feel empathy for her. She knows she basically stole from me. She also should know that any action on holding up the mortgage renewal will be seen as solely punitive against me and therefore the minors.

My DD went OFF last week. I asked her about connecting with her mom. She said “She can’t teach me anything. Not about school or being independent or about self discipline or about being a partner or a parent. She won’t work enough to support herself. Do you think I don’t know what that means? It means she needs a man, but she comes with so many red flags no man is staying for long. So, she takes what she can. She gets her rent, or her car fixed, and HE gets what he paid for before he moves on. That’s who my mother is now.”

That hurt incredibly to hear and to face. It hurt that our child sees that. Like, that REALLY hurt to the point that I don’t like to think about it. I loved my wife and value intimacy, But I expect it’s true.

My oldest had a big outburst last week about never being loved by his mom, and her just sucking up love and resources from the family. He’s a big powerful man and an injured little boy at the same time.

It’s hard stuff. But we’re good.

Last edited by RDMercer; Jun 20, 2024 at 11:01 AM..
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