When i hit bottom psychologically, a few mistakes i had been making became clear to me. When the time came, i pushed myself not to repeat them and to act or respond differently.

You seem like you want something very specific from a therapist. But im not sure what it is.

What reading have you done on dissociation?
The Haunted Self is good. Also Bessel van der Kolk. Alice Miller wrote some very relatable books.

Personally, i am doing better now that both parents have passed, and i have stopped therapy, altho i still take medication.