I've had all sorts of diagnoses since 1986 including bipolar, schizoaffective, asbergers, etc. None of the doctors I've seen inpatient or outpatient the last 35 years ever used their knowledge to figure out the root cause of my anxiety or tried to figure out that I was dissociating even after I described it to them. All they did was hand me anxiety pills.
And I didn't have "intense testing"! I had a lousy Neuropsych test that contained extremely general questions that I couldn't believe and none of the questions were designed to pinpoint my symptoms or problems or diagnoses. The psychologist that gave me the test and wrote the test summary didn't even take into consideration that I've had a severe mood and anxiety disorder, agitation and dissociation which started in my teens.
I know what happened to me when I was 13 and I researched it thoroughly and it explained exactly what I went thru in my teens/20s/30s. I had to do research because no one else was willing to put the effort into finding the causes of my symptoms. All they did was hand me pills and experiment with me because I was acutely anxious. I totally accept the fact that she and others have said I have personality disorders and I've wanted to talk about it badly the last 10 yrs but no one wants to discuss it! And no professional has been smart enough to understand that I dissociated even after I described it to them because no one knows anything about the disorder!
Dr I saw 20 yrs ago said I was bipolar and put me on all mood stabilizers for 3 yrs with no response and refused to give me anti-depressants. I've never been manic in my life.
And I haven't wasted all my years or rejected help (I've never been offered much help in the mental health system to begin with - psychologists in and out of the hospital in the 90s never offered me any suggestions! And living in a halfway house after ECT destroyed me in 1992 was totally traumatic and none of the staff offered me help - several of the staff even put me down because I couldn't hold a conversation because I was so detached from and couldn't feel myself!). I've tried REAL hard since I was 13 to pull myself together and reverse things by staying active, struggling thru college, working constantly since I was 13, extensive exercise my whole life, traveling, hobbies, getting off disability in 1996 and working at a law firm then USAF in NM as an engineer (then becoming extremely sick when my meds stopped working in 2002 and going back on disability after I couldn't hold a couple really simple jobs) all the while being extremely dysfunctional and feeling horrible and none of what I've done has improved my mood or energy, built my self-esteem or confidence, or help me feel things around people. And now I can barely do anything because my energy has never improved since ECT in 1992.
You're extremely shallow and telling me I'm living a fantasy is totally false, degrading and an insult. Your insight is lousy and you're far from being open-minded.