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You know the response to placate her is illogical and irrational so why are you trying to rationalize it? Nobody is saying you have to be mean but you need to hold your boundaries and let her deal with the fallout of her own behavior. As your brother says, if she had the power she would vituperate you.
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Nammu
…Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …...
Desiderata Max Ehrmann
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