You don’t have the user mentality. You don’t like the power game and prefer to contribute to an overall positive. You try to keep things honest.

You developed an intense desire to win over your wife and you allowed her to treat you badly. That really bothered your oldest son and your daughter. Your son is so happy that you have been learning to stand up for yourself. Children get very upset if the witness a parent being abused.

I can relate to the feelings you describe and it’s taken me a while to learn to understand where my own emotional challenges come from. I know all about wanting the genuine love relationship and wanting to do what’s needed to accomplish that. I have learned some very hard lessons.

I do know that it’s important to listen and observe because people do tell you who they are.