@Mountaindewed I hope you are able to enjoy your trip and that your health issues don't really act up while you are on it!

I found a friend who is willing to stay the night with me when I get my endoscopy! My friends are saints. Since I don't have family here, my friends have done a ton for me these past few years to help me out, including when I couch hopped for six weeks when I first, in a very unexpected turn of events, ended up moving back here with 48 hours notice.

Counseling went okay today. It's an adjustment getting used to this new counselor because she has a plan of strategies she wants to teach me but I do more talking/filling in her in on things with my other counselor. This new counselor wants me to practice two different strategies each day (twice a day per strategy) and to take notes on how they go. After counseling, I got lunch with a friend and went with her to see Inside Out 2.

I'm noticing a new pattern when I'm pretty depressed-even though I know how miserable it is, I find myself tempted to try and trigger hypomanic, or even full on manic, symptoms. A bipolar buzz just sounds better than depression sometimes and I think it's just my brains way of telling me it wants an escape from reality.