Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyShadow
What's interesting about the nutritionist that I had @Lemoncake is that she recommended the drink "Boost" to me which ended up making me gain weight, so not much good she did. *Sigh* I had no experience with Protein shakes so I had no idea what it would do. Then she went on vacation and just never came back. :/ Suffice to say, I am hesitant about getting another one.
This weight issue is really out of control. Gaining 50 pounds in the past three months have been very traumatic for me, and only now was I told how out of balance my thyroid is. I am glad I have answers, but the damage is done. The effect on my mental health has been severe, I am drowning in self-hate and eating even MORE out of all my pain. I have no motivation to diet or exercise either. I just want to sit and feel sorry for myself and complain. My therapist says I have a "bully" in my personality that does this, and I believe him. I have named this "bully" my younger, skinnier self that can't drink and party anymore and is just pissed with me being sober and fat. I feel like Al Pacino from "Devil's Advocate" is mocking me by saying in my ear, "Vanity is my favorite sin" because I know how vain I really am - my woes with weight have almost nothing to do with health.
|
I'm really sorry to hear about your experience with the nutritionist. It sounds incredibly frustrating and disappointing, especially given how much trust you placed in seeking professional help.
In moments with the internal bully, practicing radical acceptance might help. It doesn’t mean you approve of or agree with what's happening, but it means recognizing the truth of your current situation without resisting it and adding extra layers of shame. Have you looked if you could get any extra governmental program or charity support ?
I hope you can find some compassion for yourself. It's clear that you're going through a lot, and it's okay to feel overwhelmed and to take things one step at a time.