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Opus1212
New Member
 
Member Since Jul 2024
Location: United States
Posts: 3
Default Jul 18, 2024 at 06:53 PM
 
Hi. I’ve never been on this forum, but I wanted to challenge my self to reach out and seek some type of encouragement. I watch a lot of videos online about recovering from narcissistic abuse, particularly scapegoating and mobbing. I’ve been ganged up on and scapegoated in many different environments, and I’ve been under going a big reset in my life. I’m very dedicated to healing and creating a better life for myself- but a big and completely unforeseen problem that I’ve been facing after removing the many toxic people from my life is that I now have chronic, constant nightmares- mostly of these past people coming into my dreams to gaslight, attack me, and emotionally dump on me. It’s been going on for over 4 years now, and it is so obsessive and incessant that it feels like I can no longer focus on my self. As best I can figure out, it is a form of emotional enmeshment with these people. Especially now days, its so easy to follow people online, and I can tell that since I’ve cut off a lot of these relationships they just literally never let go of me and stopped trying to track me. But it’s feeling very invasive and making it hard to move forward in my life and feel separate from these people and situations. I’m constantly being triggered and retraumatized from nightmares, and it’s given me a lot of social anxiety that has kept me from moving forward to build new things in my life, so I feel a little bit stuck in limbo. I keep telling myself to just “get over it”, or that I’m going to try harder, but, like I said it’s been years and I feel like I’m stuck in a sand pit and like I’m making no progress at all. I was initially so excited to cut off these relationships, and there’s literally zero risk of me going back to any of them, but at the same time it’s like I have no space or inner privacy from these people. Has anyone ever experienced something like this? It’s like the psychic attack from hell.
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