I am so sick of this...

I think my bipolar has gotten worse the older I get. Anyone else feel this way? I read an article about this a long time ago, but I can't remember what it's called. Something that end in -ing. Gosh, darnit! It's like it's right there but I can't remember. I find my memory is the pits while manic; though to be fair, it's the pits while depressed too, only good when I'm stable.

I suppose cluminess while manic is due to moving and trying to do things so fast so you can get to the next thing and the next and the next on your mind? I have so many bruises on my legs especially from running into walls more than usual. It doesn't help I'm clumsy to start with. And talk about dropping stuff! Half the time I drop things into the trash now, I miss the trash can, broke a light fixture by dropping it while trying to replace the bulb.

Agitated again, but I'll try a rest period, maybe listen to music and lie down, concentrate ONLY on my tv program...idk

Oh, but as a non-sequitar, I've found being on lamitical has finally helped the cramping in my feet associated with peripheral neuropathy, which is why I'm walking again. pdoc only restarted lamotrigine 2 weeks ago now. Also, H has crap on a folding table to sort through in the area where i do pilates...i need a day or 2 of pilates again for a rest from the heat outdoors. I have a super easy beginners youtube video i like to use, the instructor makes the time fly by quickly. I don't really sweat much with it or burn many calories, but it is calming and relaxing and i NEED calming right now! Obviously (this is how my mind jumps ALL the time).