My memory has become really bad - my pdoc says my depression is causing it. There are really big gaps in my memory and I have trouble even with short term memories like directions to drive someplace.

I'm thinking that since my memory is already in rough shape, it couldn't be much worse with ECT. Since Ketamine didn't work for me, I am now qualified for ECT if I want it. My prodc said I just need to tell her I want to proceed and I can get on the waitlist pretty quickly (so I wouldn't need a referral, assessment, or other clinical things that take time). I've been thinking about it for a while. I wonder what it would do for my anxiety - maybe I'll forget I have it so it wouldn't be a problem then lol!

Today was a day of driving my mother around. It's the same tomorrow. Klonopin helps the physical symptoms of my anxiety but my mind is still doing its thing. I wasn't as paranoid today as I was yesterday, but it increased when I got home.