I have fallen into depression again. I have been sitting there in the sofa for hours. I wasn't able to find a tool, so I decided to come here and try to move out of the depression online. ....

Well, here are my thoughts: I want to find someone to share my life with, but am afraid to try.OK, I have accepted that maybe this is not the right timing. (How do one date when depressed?)

I think the best I can do is to continue my progress with my CBT and DBT tools and not give up now. I will try to fill the hours until medication time this evening with "things" that doesn't need much energy.

After that I will use Netflix to distract until bedtime.

I will put the alarm to ring at 07:00 tomorrow. I will go through my usual morning routines and then take a short walk to get fresh air, and I will visit a grocery store on the way home.

After that:


- Clean table in living room
- Clean and declutter kitchen.
- Put my self going vacuum cleaner to work.
- Wash floors in living room and kitchen.

If I can do all that, I hopefully will feel that I am on my right path.

I don't know about you, but sometimes it is like an inner door opens inside my head and makes me "fight" against old memories while sitting still, as if it is important to not be seen. In such days, it is important to accept that it happened and then make a plan for the nearest days.

The close friend question? I think that can wait until my life is more stable. Stability first, then the male friend, if I still want that when life is more on track.

Am sending good thoughts to all of you!