"I had this ache, and I thought it was for sex, but it's to tear everything to ****ing pieces" (Ginger Snaps)
But really, why do I, or anyone, feel the need to feed energy into destroying myself? It's not like I spend 24/7 intentionally ripping out wires in the airplane, but it's almost like I have half an hour of down time and automatically it's gotta do something unhealthy, sometimes potentially lethal. And I just don't care as long as I (at least believe that I)'m not hurting anyone else.
How do I manage that half hour of boredom that leads to idk an hour of self harm or binge drinking or something
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"I don't know what I'm looking for."
"Why not?"
"Because...because...I think it might be because if I knew I wouldn't be able to look for them."
"What, are you crazy?"
"It's a possibility I haven't ruled out yet,"
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