Sorry to hear about those interactions, it sounds difficult.

You’ve probably had way more experience of narcissistic personalities than me, but I read this article about covert narcissism:

Covert Narcissist: Signs, Causes, and How to Respond

It can be more subtle apparently. Of course narcissistic behaviour can be a trauma response, in the case of your friend who experienced narcissistic abuse herself, although that’s not necessarily the case of course.