If i could do it over again i would be much more cautious about romance. The two times i got my heart broken i really suffered and it was all easily avoidable. The first time i can forgive myself for, because the first time you fall in love, you do it without any knowledge of how painful it can be if it fails. But the second time i should have been smarter. I ignored all the warning signs each time.

I also wish i'd been nicer to my parents, especially since i've gotten sicker and it's so hard to take care of myself now. They really worked hard for us kids and i was ungrateful and i regret that.

The thing i am proudest of is that i never had kids. I didn't want to pass my suffering on to them. I got divorced over it, but i'm glad i didn't back down.

There's been a lot of suffering in my life, especially now when i'm getting older and sicker, but it helps to look thru my journals and Facebook page and remember that other times i was more active and life was colorful and rewarding.