I feel awful. Walking my dog three times a day is exhausting me. I wanted to go to a street festival and i couldn't because i'm so sore and have to save my energy for my dog. It's a big adjustment, also keeping to a schedule of 8:30am, 2:30pm, and 8:30pm. Yesterday my dog couldn't wait for her scheduled breaks and i ended up taking her out four or five times. Getting a dog is one of the worst hypomania-induced mistakes i've made. She's tolerating her schedule better today tho. Hopefully she'll adjust. *I* have to adjust too.

My mood is unstable too, with the change of seasons. I had such an unusually active week. The soaring hope of making a friend with B, and the agony of realizing it's not real has really made me feel hopeless.

I'm thinking of using alcohol to cope. My mom was a functional alcoholic. It worked for her. I can tell it would be easy for me to become an alcoholic because the rare time i drink i am haunted by the taste for days afterward.

I'm so frustrated and miserable...

I think i'll just focus on my dog this week and not do any other activities, just walk her and rest. There. That's a plan for the better.