I've never racked up any debt while manic and most of my hypo episodes have been benign (as in I didn't get into any trouble), but during the worst manic episode of my life I literally lost everything in a single action (that was acted upon out of rage).

I don't feel regret about it because I was REALLY manic and psychotic and not myself at the time. I DO feel guilty despite that though, even if I know I shouldn't. I felt like a monster for quite a while after the event.

But we have to look at it this way - WE WEREN'T OURSELVES AT THE TIME.

Sure, some actions are controllable. I'm not saying they're not, but we really were out of our minds. Out of control.

So try not to feel bad and just move forward. Take steps to make sure it doesn't happen again (like maybe once your credit debt is paid off cancel that card and just keep the one your mom has so you can only use it in emergency situations, in case you get manic again).

🫂 ❤️