I rang the helpline this afternoon, and somebody I hadn't spoken with before answered.
I gathered myself, and prepared to explain again.

She let me talk for a while, and then redirected me to one of the bereavement advisors.
With one thing and another, I ended up talking her ear off for nearly two hours.

She said that she didn't think I'm a coward - this is sensitive territory for me, and it's understandable given the position I'm in.

I had no idea where we left off, so I had to fill her in on what I'd come to understand about Steve's death.

By the time we speak, we'll be debriefing this workshop, if I end up going.

I don't want to put myself through it, but my work ethic says different.