Oh my god. SO many submissions to read for the ezine. I'm accepting into January now. Our little ezine is getting noticed. We were mentioned in a podcast and listed in Duotrope (hence suddenly getting SO many submissions!). I was reading submissions for four hours straight and I'm still not caught up.

Mood-wise I still feel like crying, but hopefully I'll feel better tomorrow. My SI thoughts aren't too bad, so that's good. Didn't tell my hormones obsessed therapist about those because I was worried she'd commit me. She's done it in the past. And the hospital would NOT be good for me right now. All I would do is sit there and cry and miss my family and go through med withdrawal and my anxiety would skyrocket.

My therapist recommended I hold off on writing that letter/text to my mom expressing my feelings about our non existent relationship and how she fukked me up until I start to feel better again, and that's probably a good idea.