@RDMercer, thank you, I appreciate you chiming in on my thread and I appreciate your perspective and thoughts, even though mine are slightly different.

The difference is I feel very strong - I feel powerful. And just this morning I adopted that perspective.

He can't contact me, or else I will get a restraining order, just as I had threatened to him early last April. That was our actual last communication.

When I have spotted him in the neighborhood at a store, I have avoided all contact. And there's been 3-4 instances where I have spotted him.

I caught eyes with him in early August in a parking lot at a concert, just as was walking to our car with a male friend of mine, and as my ex was driving right by us. We caught eyes, and he put on a sad puppy dog look but I remained blank and unaffected. I looked away, held my head high and kept walking unphased by it.

And today, I am drawing strong boundaries. I have mentally placed a huge brick wall between my side of the neighborhood and his side. He cannot penetrate my side - even if he drives by my home.

He doesn't get access to me anymore - and on social media? I am only making certain posts public so that if he spies on me with another account - a secret account, and I believe he has one because I found it - well, he will see that I have made new friends, that I've been traveling, that I've been enjoying life without him, and that I am thriving at work. So be it if he can access those photos - I want him to. I want him to know that he could not kill me, as he had hoped. He can't touch me - he cannot be with me. I am happy on my own, is what I want to communicate. And that for me is most empowering.

I haven't physically been face to face talking to him since last Feb. That was the last time I had given him any real access to me. And i had let down my guard then, mistakenly. Well, never again. Never again will I speak to him. And therein lies my power. I will not allow it.