don't want to be like this anymore. I'm so much better than I was when I was a teenager but it's never going to be good enough for me. I'm safe because I know the statistics for Victoria if I succeeded. I hate being a **** up, I hate not being able to do things for myself. I didn't think I was in this headspace but I guess I am. What's the point of life if you're allergic to stress. I yet again have to cut my hair. I'm stupid and don't deserve to breathe I'm losing insight and believing Anna. I don't want help. I don't deserve help. I am a waste of a human. I can't do anything right. I ****ed up my kid. The one job I had was to create a happy, healthy child and I couldn't even do that. I'm supposed to be studying, getting my life together instead I'm just sitting in psychosis with little hope it'll go away in the next few weeks. Maybe bloodletting is the answer but everyone is so ****ing controlling I can't do it these bugs are killing me.