Quote:
Originally Posted by Rive.
You need to work on taking your power back. See how you interact with people and how you berate yourself. You don't need to beg people or plead with people to be 'allowed' to do or not do what *you* want. You are not a child. What can they do to you? There is already no bonding. At least, you could remove yourself from abusive environments.
Finally, going forward, do not keep collecting red flags and allow others to abuse you. Care, love, and respect yourself more. That way, no one will be able to abuse you. Ever.
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@ Rive.
Thank you for replying, and they said if I don’t eat with them I would have to move. literally find somewhere else to live, it’s very painful to me and I have no choice. Because they feel like Im not trying to bond with them. That’s what I mean when I say “I have to eat with them”. So it’s either be homeless or sit at the dinner table. They said dinner time is the ONLY important time, where everyone can come together and connect to one another. Everyone follows this rule not just me. But how can I bond or connect with them when I’m getting abused? ! 😔
Of course, I know I’m not a child. But what can I do, when even before I moved here, I promised that we’d eat together everyday at dinner. That was the only rule I have to abide by living here. I thought to myself how bad could be to eat dinner with them, at least I will have a house to live in. But I didn’t know that I was gonna go through this. Sighssss………
Also, I will never reach out to those cold hearted people again (his mom). I understand now that, even if you’ve known people for decades it don’t matter. People will defend their children, even if they are wrong.
From now on, I won’t ever share my feeling with my brother either. Because he would just twist my words and abuse me. Never in my life did I think my own blood would hurt me, especially when my life is already messed up. Why would you kick a dog when it’s down?
But it seems he has major depression and wants to take it out on me. His wife said just ignore his comments, he’s had a bad day at work etc. She always makes up an excuse for why he’s being mean to me. That’s how everyone deals with him, they ignore his smart *** comments even when he’s trivializing you. And he always makes up lies, will bring up random stuff that “I supposedly said”. Which I didn’t. I’ve tried many times to ignore it, because I felt bad for him.
But still he abuses me, from the first day till now (5mths) it has never stopped. But of course, like I said in the past fights, 90% of the time, I would argue back , get into cussing and everything. I am the type of person, that doesn’t like people saying false things about me. I realize trying to correct him doesn’t work and makes things even worse. So now I’m just gonna try to ignore him completely with the grey rock method.