Thanks, Lost. Thank you for understanding about not being able to do deep work especially on a deadline. It's stressful. Every moment counts. And time goes by too fast when you need it to go slow. (And goes too slow when you need it to go fast). Four and a half months is all I've got and that's only if she makes it to her due date. Babies can come early. I came 3 weeks early.
I just want to get to a place where I have confidence in my relationship with L. Where I can feel secure and maybe even a little safe? Three months, on my own without a therapist is hard. I know I did it last time, but I did have a little therapeutic support during it. This time looks like L will be my only therapeutic support.