T wants me to eat regularly, sleep and make a routine with my hobbies where I'm up at a certain time and sleeping at a certain time. I've given up . I'm missing taking my meds 2 days a week. My hair needs to be cut but I'm too self conscious to go out side. I have pdoc Monday h thinks they're going to hospitalize me. But the truth is it's not just me. There's no clean dishes, no clean clothes, the house needs work. I bought paper plates and silverware but it doesn't help if there's no pots and pans cleaned so still can't use the kitchen. Winter is coming where I don't go outside we have to fill out assistance again and that keeps being pushed back. I want to say **** it and watch everything burn. I'm pretty much mute again. I spent all our money again so I don't know if I have the $4 for the bus Monday.. my therapist has me going 2x a week. She said she'll address food next meeting. I know I can't wallow. I'm supposed to put the paperwork in for the CPA but I don't Care. I've talked about a payee but h doesn't want that. I just want to simplify everything. We're all in our own little bubble.how do I get out and start caring.